In Jenny Han’s 2009 novel, The Summer I Turned Pretty, Belly Conklin struggles to be a good friend. Although Belly claims that Taylor Jewel is her best friend (p. 9), Belly repeatedly exhibits unhealthy feelings and behaviors towards Taylor. Belly’s destructive approach to her friendship with Taylor comes to light the summer when Taylor visits Belly in Cousins Beach for the first time. Belly, her mother, and her brother, go to the beach every summer with the Fisher family, and Belly harbors complicated feelings for the brothers Conrad and Jeremiah Fisher. When Taylor comes into this context, Belly’s insecurities flare. Belly does not like the meeting between Taylor and the brothers, Conrad and Jeremiah. Belly’s insecurities manifest as jealousy, unkindness, and dishonesty, and Taylor Jewel becomes the biggest victim of them all.

Jealousy

Belly claims: “Taylor was always the pretty one, the one the boys looked at for that extra beat. I was the funny one, the one who made the boys laugh. I thought that by bringing her I’d be proving that I was a pretty one too” (p. 66). Belly labels Taylor and labels herself. No one else calls Taylor, “the pretty one,” and Belly “the funny one,” and none of the situations Belly relates suggests that anyone feels this way. Belly judges her friend and herself and creates labels that hurt both girls. Belly labels Taylor “the pretty one,” which not only others her, but puts her in an enviable position. When Belly invites Taylor to Cousins Beach for a week, she does so in hopes to gain something from her proximity to Taylor. Belly feels jealous of Taylor because of a label she herself assigns Taylor. When Taylor arrives at Cousins Beach, Belly remembers: “[Taylor] walked off the plane in a pair of short shorts and a tank top I’d never seen before. Hugging her, I tried not to sound jealous…” (p. 67). When Belly sees her friends arrive in Cousins Beach, the first emotion Belly feels is jealousy. She notices the clothes Taylor wears because they are unlike the clothes she chooses to wear. She feels that Taylor’s clothes attract more attention from boys. Belly also notices the clothes because they are new. When Belly introduces Taylor to Conrad and Jeremiah Fisher, she worries that Taylow will begin to like and flirt with one of them. Belly complains, “…whichever guy she picked would feel like a leftover…I would be jealous if she picked Jeremiah too, because he was my friend, not hers” (p. 73). Belly does not want Taylor to flirt with either Conrad or Jeremiah because she wants them both for herself. She admits that Taylor’s feelings about them will influence her own feelings about them, which illustrates Belly’s focus on Taylor’s decisions and actions. Ultimately, Belly does not feel happy to introduce Taylor to Conrad and Jeremia. Belly feels jealous of Taylor’s appearance, her clothes, and her relationships (whether they are imagined or real).

Unkindness

Belly’s jealousy of Taylor negatively affects the way she thinks and talks about Taylor. Just after Belly introduces Taylor to Conrad and Jeremiah, Belly tries to reason why Taylor is not a good match for Conrad. Belly thinks that Conrad is serious and that, “[Taylor] was about as deep as an inflatable kiddie pool” (p. 70). Belly’s characterization of Taylor infantilizes and even dehumanizes Taylor. At one point during Taylor’s visit to Cousins Beach, Laurel asks Belly where Taylor is, and Belly replies, “Who knows?…Who cares?…I’m just starting to wish I hadn’t brung her, is all” (p. 180). Belly tells her mother that she knows nothing of Taylor’s whereabouts, and does not care. Belly suggests that no one cares. Belly tells her mother she is not happy that Taylor is there with them. Years after Taylor’s first visit to Cousins Beach, Jeremiah muses about the type of girl he likes. Belly tells Jeremiah, “You liked Taylor, and she’s not like that…I’m just saying. She wasn’t that smart and confident” (p. 81). First, Belly tries to make Jeremiah feel badly for the positive attention he gives Taylor. In her effort to shame Jeremiah, Belly makes Taylor the object of shame. As Belly teases Jeremiah, she talks badly about Taylor. Belly suggests that Taylor is stupid and insecure. To herself, her mother, and Jeremiah, Belly questions Taylor’s depth, worth, intelligence, and confidence.

Dishonesty

The jealousy and negative feelings that Belly develops for Taylor causes Belly to often hide her true thoughts from Taylor. Regarding graduation, Taylor tells Belly she would like them to visit Cabo together. Belly does not tell Taylor what she would like to do for graduation. Belly relates, “I wanted to go to the Galápagos Islands for graduation, that was my dream. I wanted to see a blue-footed booby. My dad said he’d take me too. I didn’t tell Taylor, though. She wouldn’t like it” (p. 66). Taylor shares her thoughts about a graduation trip with Belly, but Belly does not share her thoughts with Taylor. Belly’s choice not to mention her interest in the Galápagos Islands reveals how she withholds even the most benign information from Taylor. Belly predicts Taylor’s reactions and does not give Taylor the chance to react herself. When Taylor visits Belly at Cousins Beach, Belly is not straightforward about her feelings for Conrad and Jeremiah. Belly thinks to herself, “The truth was, I liked both [Conrad and Jeremiah] in different ways and I didn’t want [Taylor] to know” (p. 73). Again, Belly denies Taylor the truth. Belly does not tell her best friend that she has feelings for both of her childhood friends, Conrad and Jeremiah. Belly does not want to tell Taylor the truth. However, even when Belly wants to talk honestly with Taylor, she doesn’t. One night, Belly admits, “I wished I could talk to Taylor…When she came back upstairs an hour later, I pretended I was sleeping” (p. 179). Belly allows her jealousy and negative thoughts about Taylor to overpower her instinctive desire to connect with Taylor. She sacrifices opportunities to talk with Taylor in favor of silence.

The summer Belly turns fourteen, Belly allows her problems with Taylor to grow. Belly’s undesirable behavior begins with her jealousy towards Taylor. Belly’s first mistake is to designate Taylor as the pretty friend. The image of Taylor that Belly creates in her mind, of Taylor as the inherently more attractive friend, affects the rest of their relationship. In her mind, Belly puts her friend and herself at odds. Belly’s jealousy causes her to view Taylor as a competitor. She resents Taylor’s new clothes and feels suspicious that Taylor will steal Conrad and Jeremiah away from her. Because Belly feels threatened by Taylor’s beauty, her clothing, and her interactions with others, Belly begins to judge Taylor harshly. Belly’s jealous feelings make her think unkind thoughts about Taylor and to make unkind comments about her. Belly expresses her dissatisfaction with Taylor to her mother, and makes disparaging accusations of her to Jeremiah. Belly hides all of these negative feelings from Taylor, which gives Taylor no chance to help ease the negativity. In order to improve her friendship with Taylor, Belly must learn how to behave with more empathy.

References

Han, J. (2009). The summer I turned pretty. Simon and Schuster.